i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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