my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
