She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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