We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
