Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
this hospital has no fireball
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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