there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
She has the best kind of daddy issues
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize