no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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