I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
id be glad to
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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