i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
