its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize