There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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