She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
The Olympian is in my bed
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
