oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Are my feet made of real feet?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
