Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
