Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize