How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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