just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
