i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just had sex bonerless
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
