God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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