I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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