I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Are these your boobs on my camera?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
