the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
