I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
