hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
MIDGETS
????
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
