Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize