Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We have so much sex to catch up on
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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