I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Randomize
