Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
