I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
