we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
