good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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