she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize