I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
accomplished twins. life is a go
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
