best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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