How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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