so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize