She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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