my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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