Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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