you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
