oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
