What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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