i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I stole a fireplace last night.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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