You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize