no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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