Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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