HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
