i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
