I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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