the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
